Alien Jesus Collective

Fla. Teacher Accused Of Wizardry - Orlando News Story - WKMG Orlando

A Florida teacher made a toothpick disappear in class. That evening, a superintendent called saying he was being suspended. He was being accused of Wizardry.

Wizardry!

Strap-On Helicopter Could Offer Solo Flying Experience
“Technologia Aeroespacial Mexicana (TAM) has designed a strap-on helicopter. Tiny rockets on the tips of the propellers eliminate the need for a tail rotor, making it possible for the device to be worn on a human body.”

This should make crossing the border more interesting. Dobbs ain’t gonna like this.

NPR has more story and an interview with the inventor.
NPR Mexican Jet Pack interview.

Millennium Ark: Hot News-Unnatural Grid Appears in Nevada Earthquakes

Stan Deyo has a detailed graphic map of the recent swarm of earthquakes in Northern Nevada.
Mother Nature? According to Stan, this is a most unnatural pattern.
Big Brother?

Big Alien Brother?

The Ancient Sky: Answers Powered by Astrology
“The DC Madame was our client.
Le Baraquel (a pseudonym) and I agreed to help out pro bono but had deep worries in working with this chart. “

These people claim to be the astrologers for DC Madam, Deborah Jeane Palfrey.

Lynn Hayes of Astrodynamics, offers her take on the chart:

“When a death occurs under a Saturn transit the conclusion of suicide is more believable since Saturn can impose a sentence of depression and despair to those who have not developed an inner core of strength.

We often find Jupiter in death charts, but it is missing here. Metaphysicians teach that the soul cannot find rest after taking its own life, and the lack of a Jupiter event in the chart of Palfrey’s death suggests that there is no liberation in her suicide.”

The Gamer Division of Alien Jesus gathered for the buying of Grand Theft Auto.

11:40pm, we put Colbert on pause and headed for the last round at Starbucks located right across the parking lot from Blockbuster. Thwarted! Bastards closed at 11pm.

We smoked furiously in the van and waited the 15 minutes before they Blockbuster would sell us the game.

11:50pm trucks, SUVs and other vans start pulling in. No cars. GTAers drive big vehicles.

11:55pm we go in with the other 20 or so people. Mostly men ranging from the 13 year old clutching a can of Red Bull to the overweight late 30s guy with a basement pallor.

We roamed like we were being controlled by a broken joystick. Blockbuster had made no preparation for people lining up for a game they had been heavily promoting. A loose line formed and at midnight promptly the sales began.

Gamers pay funny. A combination of cash and two or three credit cards. “If that doesn’t have enough on it, I have another one.” The cash must have come from returnable cans and bottles. Blood donations.

Nobody had pre-ordered and they didn’t know to hand out the framed art work or not to those who didn’t reserve. The line said “YES, hand out the framed art work to everybody.” They did.

Grabbed our copy and headed for coffee and cigarettes. On the way home we passed Game Crazy (the wretched game part of Hollywood video) with a huge line out front. They were handing out the GTA faceplate. I don’t care if they were actually giving the game away, AJ Gamer Division loathes and despises Game Crazy. Wait in line, you fools, we already have the shrink wrap off.

Home. Xbox on. Mission Accomplished. Review of GTA to follow.

Beltane - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia“Beltane is a cross-quarter day, marking the midpoint in the Sun’s progress between the vernal equinox and summer solstice. Since the Celtic year was based on both lunar and solar cycles, it is possible that the holiday was celebrated on the full moon nearest the midpoint between the vernal equinox and the summer solstice. The astronomical date for this midpoint is closer to May 5 or May 7, but this can vary from year to year.”

True Beltane, Sun 15 degrees Taurus, is Sunday, May 4th.

Strange Lights in Valley Sky-ABC 15

“An official from Luke Air Force Base stated that they do not have any aircraft in the sky tonight and that the lights are not part of any Air Force activities.

The Deer Valley airport officials said that the lights were not from any aircraft at that airport.

Ian Gregor, a spokesman for the Federal Aviation Administration said that air traffic controllers at Sky Harbor Airport also witnessed the lights, but they do not know the cause.”

This is Alien Jesus’ neck of the woods and this is the first time anybody is making a big deal about these lights. They’ve been around for years and nobody ever knows anything. Nobody ever much looks.

What I find the most interesting is last night so many people were looking up and decided this was strange.

Photo: Scott Cancelosi

Da Pope is in town. Cupcakes!

If you’re going to be anywhere near Geneva on April 6th, don’t miss the final opportunity to tour CERN’s Large Hadron Collider:

The Open Day on Sunday, 6 April 9:00 — 19:00, is your one last chance to see the LHC and its experiments. In addition to visiting the surface facilities, you will be able to go underground to see the accelerator and the experiment caverns. Exceptionally, most of the access points around the ring will be open.
An attractive programme of activities on the surface and underground visits awaits you on all the points around the ring, so we encourage you to visit the one closest to where you live.

Limited to 15,000 visitors, not sure how many of those are treadhead seats.

Via Slashdot

A couple of scientists are suing for a time out on CERN’s Large Hadron Collider project, current slated to come online this summer. The LHC is arguably the world’s most advanced particle accelerator (or “atom smasher”). According to the NY Times article:

But Walter L. Wagner and Luis Sancho contend that scientists at the European Center for Nuclear Research, or CERN, have played down the chances that the collider could produce, among other horrors, a tiny black hole, which, they say, could eat the Earth. Or it could spit out something called a “strangelet” that would convert our planet to a shrunken dense dead lump of something called “strange matter.” Their suit also says CERN has failed to provide an environmental impact statement as required under the National Environmental Policy Act.

Phillip Plait (of BadAstronomy.com fame) has a concise and rational response to the concerns about LHC. I tend to agree with his assessment. If you’re going to panic about world destroying science, panic about genetically modified crops.

NASA - Space Shuttle

Endeavour is scheduled to land at Kennedy Space Center, Fla., at 7:05 p.m. EDT Wednesday.